Most of you know Vicky and Demelza in some form or another. Deeply in love and happily married, this isn't the only life they could have had. In other worlds, their story ended up very differently.
•01. the special two//missy higgins•
we could only see each other •02. chocolate (final straw)//snow patrol•
we'll breathe together
these arms will not be taught to need another
cos we're the special two
Vicky and Demelza. One was hardly seen without the other. Best friends since the first day of first year, it took them entirely too long to realise how they completed each other. Six long years passed before they ended up together and they spent the next five months wound around each other. Demelza left school to pursue her career as a future rock star and Vicky remained at school, pining away. The year was a long one for both girls but they eventually ended up celebrating Vicky's graduation in the flat Demelza used as home base, over her sister's store.
The years passed and while Vicky loved Demelza with all her heart, she wanted more. Children, a marriage, their own flat, anything. Dem dug her heels in and it culminated in a huge fight on Christmas Eve. On the cusp of watching Vicky walk out of her life forever, Demelza frantically proposed. Vicky accepted and settled down to the business of planning their wedding.
this is the straw, final straw•03. soon we'll be found//sia•
in the roof of my mouth as i lie to you
just because i'm sorry
doesn't mean i didn't
enjoy it at the time
A wedding which seemed destined not to happen. There was always an excuse not to talk about Vicky's plans; a band meeting or rehearsal or a gig. Vicky plodded along, choosing flower arrangements and tablecloth colours, unable to pin her fiancée down long enough to make any concrete decisions. Demelza started staying out later and later, sometimes not coming home at all, and when she did, she reeked of alcohol and things Vicky couldn't place.
There's only so much a person can take and watching her friends get married and have children while she was stuck at home, not even knowing if her fiancée would come home that night or not, was the end of the line for Vicky.
let's not fight i'm tired•04. i am yours//tracy chapman•
can we just sleep tonight
don't turn away
it's just there's nothing left here to say
turn around i know we're lost but soon we'll be found
They'd never fought before, hardly ever even disagreed, just rubbed along comfortably. They agreed on most of the important issues and were too in love to care about the ones they didn't. Until now. Vicky wanted desperately to be married, to have children but Demelza's band was hitting it big. She was out more nights than she was in and was starting to amass both a group of scantily clothed and sketchily moraled female fans and a predilection for the drugs she was now able to get her hands on.
At a loss for what to do, Vicky made ultimatum after ultimatum, never following through with any of her threats. She left the apartment several times, spending days with friends, but Demelza never seemed to notice and her behaviour only got worse.
when all my hopes•05. one more day with you//chauntelle dupree•
and dreams have been betrayed
i stand before you
my hands are empty
i am yours
if you are mine
i am yours
if you are mine
Vicky was never sure what the last straw was, but one day Demelza came home and found her there, the flat looking much emptier than usual. This was the end, Vicky told her. She couldn't do this any more, couldn't watch Dem waste her life away while she stayed at home, in a flat that wasn't even really theirs.
It was no surprise that Demelza didn't believe her at first, Vicky'd made this speech, or others almost exactly like it, for the past year and had still been home at the end of the day. In fact, it took a few days for the reality to sink in, and by then Vicky had completely eschewed the wizarding world and was living in a sad, poky little studio flat in the middle of Muggle London.
i was wrong•06. i will follow you into the dark//kina grannis•
now i'll never see your face
oh my love, i'd give anything
for one more day with you
Demelza had always joked that she wouldn't survive without Vicky, but neither of them realised how true that statement was. Without Vicky to centre and ground her, she was a lost cause. To her credit, Demelza did try to get Vicky back, but Vicky couldn't go through the pain of another run through the cycle and refused to accept any contact from the other woman. Depressed and angry, Demelza threw herself into the band scene. Her heart broken, she wrote grittier, edgier songs filled with raw and ragged pain, causing the band's popularity to spike. Naturally a wild and reckless person with little forethought, being with Vicky forced all that into check. Without that grounding, her only priority became having fun.
After a few years, Vicky ended up half-heartedly dating a Muggle man, but she'd always held out a hope that she and Demelza would get back together. The last thing she thought about before she went to sleep and the first thing she thought about when she woke up was Demelza. Dem never stopped loving her and always wanted to get back together, but didn't think she ever had a shot, she figured she'd blown it. Since she knew Vicky was the best thing she had, and that was ruined, she didn't care about much else. Her music was all she did, that and attempting to have fun, anything to make her feel better even if for just a bit.
Too reckless to be left to her own devices, Demelza spiralled, becoming addicted to drugs both Muggle and wizarding and didn't have the will power to quit, even for Vicky, who had no idea how bad it had gotten. Until one night, her mobile rang.
if there's no one beside you•07. beloved wife//natalie merchant•
when your soul embarks
i will follow you into the dark
no blinding light or tunnels to gates of white
just our hands clasped so tight
It had been years since she'd filled out the emergency card and put it in Demelza's wallet, carefully printing her name and mobile number in clear, neat letters underneath in case of emergency. She hadn't changed her number in the intervening time, a part of her wanting to keep that avenue of contact open just in case. By the time the hospital rang, years had passed since the last time she'd seen Dem, the time was in the single digits and she'd forgotten all about the contact card.
The thought that it was Demelza waiting for her in A&E never crossed her mind until she entered the building and relayed the message she'd been given. The doctors were confused, both by the injuries she'd sustained and the drugs found in her system. It had seemed like a simple bike crash, but her injuries weren't consistent with that. In reality, one of the charms was off on Demelza's flying motorcycle. Despite being high and never having been good at charms, she attempted to fix it and failed.
Trembling so badly the doctors almost didn't want to allow her into the room, Vicky pushed her way in, only just managing to keep it together at the sight that greeted her. Despite being a mess, deep in the throes of addiction and bloodied, bruised and torn up from her accident, Vicky couldn't help but see the woman she'd loved underneath it all.
it's you i can't deny
it's you i can't defy
a depth so deep
into my grief
without my beloved soul
i renounce my life
as my right
now alone without my beloved wife
She sat by Demelza's bedside, holding back tears and remaining strong for the other woman just as she always had. Promising not to leave, she told Demelza she loved her, that she'd always loved her and never stopped, and held her hand as she died, the doctors unable to do anything to save her. In shock, Vicky refused sedatives and left the hospital, stupidly Apparating to Demelza's sister's flat, where she managed to explain what had happened before falling apart completely.